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2.20.2007

The Circle of Life


We almost did not have children.
Not by choice, but because I could not get pregnant.
We went to fertility clinics.
Did Ovulation kits, thermometer readings, clomid, sperm counts, post coital headstands, boxer briefs, perfectly synchronized 'O's , etc.
I had a hysterosalpingogram done
which was more than uncomfortable, btw
--it caused me to have a vasovagal episode in the lobby of the hospital
--which lead Steve (who embarasses easily) to tell me:
"go pass out in the ladies room"("!??#%?", said I)
But I digress.
When Elaine Henson died in December 1997, I had gone to Manila for her funeral.
My barren state widely publicized, the old ladies at the wake declared with full certainty:
"now that Elaine is gone, you will get pregnant"
-spawned out of Philippine belief that when one life passes, another is to replace it--
Throughout this constant soothsaying my thought balloon was:
How the he** does my best friend's death have anything to do with my infertility??
(of course I did not say that, it being a funeral and all)
When I got back here,
Steve condoled by surprising me with a male brindle boxer pup.
(my favorite pet reincarnated )
Immersing myself in the care of the puppy, I remained childless.
Soon after, I am not sure what had even prompted me to do it
(dog pee, perhaps?)--I was drawn to a home pregnancy test
I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me when I saw that the test was positive.
After five years of waiting, I was finally pregnant.
The pregnancy test date?
February 23, 1998. Elaine's Birthday.

6 comments:

  1. Maganda ang blog mo, im glad you came around to mine, so i can have you as my daily visits too. congrats sa paging mother mo, patience lang kapalit lang lahat, then you will have it...

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  2. Wow, the pregnancy test date is wild. I totally believe people can remain connected after death. My best friend since childhood was murdered by her ex-husband in 1998 and I swear, I still feel her prescence in my life today.

    Thank you for sharing the info and links, I find all of that very interesting. Have a beautiful day my friend.

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  3. I read this yesterday...and had to log off before I could comment-
    but I loved this story!

    It gave me a tingle...and a smile. I have no idea how we are all connected, and why things happen as they do- but I admire someone who "sees" how we all fit together...how one life affects another. How the past touches the present and the future.
    Mmmm- makes me feel warm all over :)

    I read your note at MV...by all means...tell me a story! :) I'd love that~

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  4. OK, wow. I was not expecting that last line. I have to agree with mayden ... made me feel warm all over. Totally made my night.

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  5. Damn. Chills. Thank you and blessings on you and your family.

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  6. Anonymous9:15 PM

    oh my god, kinilabutan ako dito, pero a nice, heartwarming kind of kilabot.

    i admire (alright, fine, envy!) your relationship with elaine. ive been reading your links and i realized im not sure with whom among my many, many friends do i have a bond similar to that. i mean, i thought at one point there was this one, tapos after many years hindi pala. would you believe i'm still heartbroken over that, though i wouldnt come out openly to say it. i made an entry about this last year.

    still trying to figure out if two of my friends fit the bill. i console myself with the fact that my husband and i are best friends, but a best girl friend is just well, different.

    oooh. what a revelation. too dyahi to let people know it's me, too important to delete it. i'll just sign LC, hope you know i am :)

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thanks for commenting!