Dear Exskindiver,

I work closely with a female colleague to the point that people in the office joke that we're each others' "work spouse." That's all we do-work together (honest!) But my wife is growing more and more jealous and is constantly making critical comments about this woman. When I come home after work, she blasts me with questions: What did we do today? Did we have lunch together? etc. Her jealousy is causing undue strain in our marriage. Should I ask to be reassigned?
~Strained

Dear Strained,
I don't know your background nor the obstacles you and your wife have had that have led you to where you are today. This makes it impossible to answer the simplistic question as to whether you should ask to be reassigned. However, if I had 60 seconds to yell at you and your wife without the benefit of such information-- this is what I would say to both of you:
Think of marriage as a nautical journey.
Are you both good people on board this marriage?
Do you want to get to the same place?
Do you want to be on the same boat?
If the answer is yes then follow this advice:

To Mrs. Strained,
Acknowledge your husband's ability to captain your marital ship.
Know that he will steer clear of ugly weather and navigate around maelstroms.
Tell him that you trust and respect that his seafaring skills will lead you through the relationship tides.
The more you believe in him, then the more resolve he will have to focus on avoiding unfavorable boating conditions. The most potent of whirlpools are created in narrow shallow straits with fast flowing water.
(And no, I am not calling your husband's female colleague narrow, shallow nor fast)
Respect his judgment.

To Mr. Strained,
Powerful whirlpools have killed unsuspecting seafarers.
However, there has never been a CNN report of a large boat ever sucked into a whirlpool.
Be large!
Protect, appreciate and love your first mate.
When she is busy screaming:
"maelstrom! maelstrom!"
know that she screams only because she is afraid that she is losing her captain.
Reassure your wife that you are her rudder.
I repeat, REASSURE HER of your love.
Tell her that you love how she runs your ship's engine.

To both of you,
Remember that there is a calm after every storm.
Reinforce and strengthen your boat at every chance you get.
The key is to try and avoid turbulent weather but if all else fails and the rough seas make you sick, know that vomit is good chum.
This will make the conditions good for fishing.

The End of March 2010

I was recently reading a magazine at a dentist’s office when a print ad caught my eye: Doga classes, 20.00/session.

Doga, for those of you out there who may not know, is a yoga class humans might take with their dog.

The very idea struck me as ludicrous.

Dog owners around here are obsessed with their pets. American dogs eat gourmet food and get their teeth brushed after meals. Dogs are groomed, dressed and go to their scheduled wellness veterinarian appointments. American dogs have rights. And apparently, American dogs can now take yoga.....

Read the rest here in Philippine Online Chronicles.

Writing with little or no authority

I wrote for an online publication here.

The Book

photo credit: Cathy Babao-Guballa
Did I mention that an essay of mine was included in a collection of stories to inspire women?
The book was edited by Cathy Babao-Guballa.
Other authors featured are
former Ms. Universe-- Margie Moran Floirendo,
Motivational Speaker Maggie De la Riva,
Designers Criselda Lontok and Malu Veloso,
Columnist Deedee Siytangco,
Magazine Publisher Sari Yap,
Actresses Angel Jacob and Jackie Aquino,
Educator and author Nina Lim Yuson, (My brother Ted's former boss)
Lawyer and TV personality Gaby Roldan Concepcion,
and 30 other women.

The book entitled: Age of Confidence was launched last May 29th, 2008 at the Ballroom of Manila Peninsula.
Although I was unable to attend the formal event,
My mugshot was there:

Cathy wrote about it here.
Pictures of the affair are posted
here by Cathy Babao-Guballa ,
here by Talent Manager Girlie Rodis and
here by Nel Alejandrino for a local newspaper.
And a write-up here by the Manila Times
and here.

Guess what you are all getting for Christmas this year?

Can Blogging Save Lives?

ButrflyGarden and Brillig prompting for gyne stories reminded me that I am due for an appointment.
After having done my interior pep talk monologue I finally made the dreaded call.
'Due for an appointment' is an understatement considering the receptionist informed me that the last time I was in was November 2005!!!
(Steve is going to kill me when he reads this)
Where has time gone?
Wasn't it just yesterday when I was lying there, doubled over laughing
(loud guffaws, mind you) while the wonderful older gentleman who delivered my first-born attempted a breast-exam?
Was it that long ago when I was surprised by a two-pronged pelvic exam?
(I had to clarify with Steve that this was in fact kosher)

The fact is it is unpleasant.
As my dear friend Suzanne always says:
Of course you hate it. There is something seriously wrong with you if you actually enjoy it.

So can blogging save a life?
It can if it triggers a reminder to do a lifesaving chore you've put off.
My appointment is scheduled a week from today.

So go ahead and get that breast/pap/prostate/kidney/heart/
or depression...checked out.
This will improve the meretricious persiflage reputation of blogging.

There has got to be some value to this addiction.

On a somewhat related note, an ob-gyn scene on
Desperate Housewives has my peeps in a tizzy.
It gave me the impetus to write this for the Blue Ribbon site.

My work here is done.

E-zine Article

An article I wrote for the E-zine PMN was published today.
Will you read it?