My criteria for Facebook friendship used to fall under several categories:
1. former students
2. former school friends, elementary, high school, college
3. people I worked with
4. relatives
5. people from my present life
In the very beginning of my Facebook life (2008), as I sought and accepted friendships, I was ecstatic about reuniting with people.
I was liking, viewing, commenting, reading!
And then one day, I realized that I was spending too much time on it and less time being present in-real-life.
It dawned on me that I had collected too many FB friends.
It was a time suck.
I was way over Dunbar's number to make meaningful connections.
So, I started methodically eliminating friends.
People who "friended me" who I could see were active (you can see this you know) but were unresponsive to actually connecting with me, were eliminated at first round.
My feeling being, perhaps we were just not Facebook compatible. No worries.
Next round,
I examined each individual and asked myself: 'friend or acquaintance?'
Acquaintances got de-friended.
The only people that had immunity from any eliminations were former students.
The third round of eliminations was, 'anyone that I did not want seeing me in a bathing suit.'
Which was soon followed by 'anyone that I did not want seeing me without eye makeup on.'
Then because I realized that that I did not want anyone to see me without eye makeup,
I deactivated.
Three things I realized while writing this just now:
First, it is pretty obvious to me that keeping any and all former students from the chopping block must mean that I hold on to that part of my life that made me feel worthwhile.
Second, just because you know or like or love someone, does not mean you need to be connected, linked, instagrammed, or followed.
and third, I really need to get a grip and stop taking everything so seriously.
If people don't feel like interacting on facebook, perhaps it just isn't their thang.
It does not have to mean anything.
So today in 2015, my criteria for being FB friends is this:
If you are someone I would stop and chat with in-real-life--and I am someone you would stop and chat with in-real-life--AND we occasionally do so on FB--then we are FB compatible.
My opening status update for 2015 was:
"What did I miss?"
I am happy to be back in touch with people.
The downside is, since I have been back on FB, I've discovered that three FB friends have since passed away.
Such is life.