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10.22.2012

Wide Berth

It's Monday evening.
I suddenly craved a sausage sandwich.
The four of us ate at a nearby college-crowd hangout.
I had a humongous kielbasa sandwich with french fries (stuffed in the sandwich) and cole slaw.
I am now bloated.
On the way home we dropped Steve off at a corner near his gym.
Just as Steve shut the door, a car that drove up behind us honked.
I think the driver was irritated about the half-a-second wait.
Something came over me.
My blood was not exactly boiling,  but I instinctively started driving VERY slowly.
C-r-a-w-l-i-n-g at a snail's pace...with an occasional slam on the brakes just for good measure.
This is not like me btw.
I am proud to say that I usually don't get affected by rude driving behavior.
Not only do I not act road-ragey but I generally do not take it personally when people feel the need to cut me off or not take their proper turn at a stop sign.
I can shrug that off.

Road rage is an ego thing.
The ego's need to be faster, first, or correct.
However, I realize that was MY EGO that motivated me to inconvenience the honker by driving slower than normal.
My ego designated myself as Irate Driver's teacher.
My ego had me convinced that I was teaching her that impatience only brings less favorable results.
The reality of it is, all I succeeded in doing was energizing ugly behavior.
Ego energizes ugly behavior.
It was not a peaceful move and a very bad example for my girls.
Already, Kika-who was also annoyed by the car, needs no encouragement to develop the propensity for the unsafe act of road rage---
While Gabi, with the smallest of egos and the voice of reason suggested:
"what if that person was just in a hurry to get home to a sick family member?"

A miracle happens when we are able to look at things from a different perspective.

Perhaps my stomach bloat is not from the kielbasa after all.
I must be pre-menstrual.
Not an excuse, but a reminder that I should be hyper vigilant against acting ugly.
I must stay alert and not allow this physiological state to take over.
Instead I should use this time to practice not getting stuck.

Until then I should wear a sign around my neck that says:
GIVE BLOAT WIDE BERTH.

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