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8.14.2007

Midlife Epiphany


I took this picture on the beach in Key West Florida.
Hair and teeth.
They are age indicators for both children and adults.
So we hang on to it in however way we can--

The caramel coloured highlights in my hair are new.
I have only had them for a few months.
It was my first time to colour my hair.
After I got them done, I felt pretty grown up.
This is ironic considering the impetus to get them was that I was trying to hide my grey hair.

I needed change.
I felt stuck--and I was beginning to feel old.
Doesn't that suspiciously sound like a midlife crisis?

Midlife crisis.
A period when people yearn to feel young again instead of
'middle aged.'
That feeling that life is just moving on a track that is assigned but not necessarily chosen.
Of course living in an age-obsessed time where 'the cult of youth' has never been so strong does not help the "midlife crisee" either.
A midlife crisis is really a signal that something needs changing in your life or your perspective.
When social pressure plays a huge role in dictating what you should be happy about and what you should overlook--it is time to take a step back.

But should we call it a crisis? Why so negative?
Why not call it a: "MIDLIFE EPIPHANY?"

Last weekend, I had one of those midlife epiphanies.
(the first of many, I am sure)
(pictures from the midlife epiphany weekend HERE)

Presented with the opportunity to do something I had never done before, I hesitated.
I am 40 years old.
I had gone through life not ever trying it--and I was afraid that if I did something I was not used to doing, I would end up broken.
It was fear of the unknown.
My heart was pounding.
I was afraid I would end up knocking all my teeth out.
However, I knew that if I did not try it, I would live with regret.
Literally throwing all caution to the wind I jumped right in and tried water skiing
for the very first time in my life.








It felt absolutely great to take a chance.
Exhilarating actually.
Something stirred in me.
I felt alive.
It was then that I realized that we can use a midlife epiphany as a powerful motivator to seize the moment.
It can push us to live a more productive and satisfying life.
(she says as she sits at her computer, blogging)
Midlife epiphanies can encourage us to be more relaxed, optimistic and energetic about the future.
After all, teeth are overrated.

21 comments:

  1. That's great, Chesca! I feel that feeling a lot - feeling like I need to make a change. Maybe my hair would be a good place to start. Skiing still scares me. :)

    (PS - Nice legs, girl!! In one, you can just see the muscles bulging! hahah!)

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  2. It's wonderful that you're trying new things. They say that it's the things that we don't do that we regret the most.

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  3. lady cess8:26 PM

    please dont laugh at me... i can relate to the first part of your post. im starting to obsess about my hair and teeth, because yes, theyre showing signs that i would have no choice but to say goodbye to my youth,that my age would no longer be found in the calendar after a couple of months. and yes i was actually thinking of coloring my hair. ewan ko ba, ano ba nangyayari sa akin :)

    i wish i can do what you did, pero wala yata rito nyan, kung meron man di ko alam kung nasan.

    yes, i agree that a remedy would be to do something that ive never done before, but the thing is, i dont what that is. at least not yet. you see ive done a number of things one might call throwing caution to the wind so iba na yata ang standards ko of what's never been done before :)

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  4. Dear Chesca,
    Forgive the novel - since I don't leave comments as much as you'd like me to, I'll make up for it right now...hehehe : Let me share with you George Carlin's Views on Aging: Plus my own thoughts regarding your Midlife Epiphany -- I think you are growing old backwards hehehe and I mean that in a good way sister!!! I am so proud of you...

    Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

    "How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five!

    That's the key.

    You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

    "How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . . . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

    But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk. He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

    You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40.

    Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 . . . and your dreams are gone.

    But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

    So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

    You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

    You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime.

    And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."

    Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!"

    May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!


    HOW TO STAY YOUNG

    1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay " them " .

    2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

    3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. " An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

    4. Enjoy the simple things.

    5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

    6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

    7. Surround yourself with what you love, Whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

    8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

    9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

    10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

    AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
    Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

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  5. You go, girl, preach it! Gone are the days when you have to lie about your age. When I reach 40, I would be so proud to say it (if I looked like you!) and have people gasp unbelievably and say, "Noo...you can't be..!"

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  6. Midlife epiphany - I love it.

    I've tried water skiing. I actually pioneered a new sport in the process - power snorkeling. Later they told me that at a certain point it's best to give up and let go, something I'm still not particularly good at.

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  7. good for you! i havent tried it, hmmm.

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  8. What can I say, Ches. I wish I had the guts to do what you do.BTW, nice pictures.

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  9. Anonymous9:22 PM

    great great photos and good for you for giving it a go! I think of my middle age crisis as more of an awakening... but it was/is a crisis in my life for sure... I wonder when I will be back to being comfortable with who I am and where I am in my life cycle... idk... but for now, I am with you on trying all and any new things I can! We are only on this earth once! (well as far as I know! lol)

    Cheers! Kate

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  10. Midlife epiphany....Parang gusto ko yan kaysa midlife crisis ,ah...Now you got me thinking. Parang it's looking at the glass and thinking it's half full instead of half empty. O, di kaya'y seeing the doughnut,not the hole =P

    Hey, I looked at the pics on your link, and you should read my comment there. Napa-rhyme din ako doon .

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  11. Btw, thanks for visiting my Wordpress blog.
    Wala lang, kinu-compare ko lang which is better - Blogger vs Wordpress. Parehong maganda, so I'm keeping both. With WP, you can keep track of the blog stats and you'd know how many people visited, or how people found your site, mga ganoon...Like, I found out that somebody chanced on my blog dahil she/he was googling 'flagler college'. Well, not that it matters, but (Liar!,of course,it does!) , wala lang, parang enjoy lang =P to know the stats

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  12. That was such a brave thing to do! Way to go!

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  13. YEAH!!!! You go girl. That's awesome!
    Looks like you did it right and had a great time.
    Never let fear hold you back from something good.

    Life is full of possibilities... we must grab all that we can while we race through.

    I'm so glad you did it, too.

    Carpe diem...

    Scarlett & V.

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  14. great great photos! wow, you are good at what you do. i don't think i can do it.

    i think i am experiencing the midlife ephiphany, too. i used to love buying dresses for myself because it looked cute on me but that changed when I gained 10 pounds. no more whistle, and no more second look...hehe

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  15. Courage is a wonderful thing- it keeps us young at heart. Letting fear dominate our lives is what makes us truly old.
    Loved this post- it was beautiful~
    thank you :)

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  16. Ches! How great for you to attempt this :) welcome to midlife! WHen I turned 40 I tried wall climbing and what a thrill it was! Especially for someone who had never climbed a tree as a child. Sheltered diba? I want to try wakeboarding in the summer but first I have to get me some abs :) kaya panay ang gym. Loved Karen's comments too. Do send her my love.

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  17. ches! was just talking to junjun desiderio villareal.didnt realize that he is a good friend of your family. small world. learned that he visited you and your family when he was in america. junjun's family and fraternity are generous UP college of arts and letters donors. he says hello.

    wendell

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  18. Great post. Great photos. Great message. And I loved 'Midlife epiphany.' Wonderful.

    Ya know ... maybe I'll ride a hot air balloon even though I don't do well with heights after all. You've inspired me.

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  19. Now that looks like fun! Serious fun if i may say so, Ches! Galing! At poised pa rin pagdating sa pic, ha!

    What's next, kabayan? Surprise me! Skydiving? Hmmmmm. Cud be an interesting experience! ha ha ha

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  20. Anonymous7:56 AM

    chong!!good job naman

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  21. That sounds fantastic! Love the Epiphany idea! I turned 40 myself this year. When my children were little I had to bribe them to try new things. Now they see new challenges as something they might actually enjoy.

    Thanks for the great read! Amy at ButrflyGarden sent me here :-)

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thanks for commenting!